So my local newspaper's website has this "Ask The Expert" section where locals can ask local experts and business owners questions and advice on varying issues.
Well, today I noticed that there was a Funeral section. I really just HAD to ask him something...
So here's what I sent him:
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Question for the Funeral Expert
Hello,
What is the most cost effective way to dispose of a loved one after death (I don't feel like I'm using the right terminology here, but that's the best I can think of). I have instructed my family to spend as little as possible on me after my passing. A dumpster or a bonfire would suffice as they are typically easy to do with little to no overhead, but I fear there are some state laws that require that SOMEBODY be paid after a death. Is there anywhere that disposes of the body free of charge? Like how Wal*Mart will gladly take used motor oil for free? I want to be remembered in death just how I was in life...cheap, cheap, cheap and laughing all the way to the bank...except this time my bank will be in Heaven. What do you suggest my family do to best fulfill my final wishes? Thank you for your time.
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Believe it or not, I have yet to receive an answer...
Just thought I'd randomly share....but just for the record...this really IS a semi-serious question....I really have told my family to dump me off in the cheapest way possible (bury in the desert, concrete shoes off the pier, etc.)...in fact, if anyone ever comes around asking you to identify my body...say its NOT me and you've never seen that body before...I'd hate for my family to get stuck with unpaid medical expenses that the county would for sure go after....
Here's the "Expert" Link btw in case anyone wants to roam around with their own questions:
Ask The Experts : Ventura County Star